Meanwhile, I felt like I did some charity or something by getting my friend Adham a job for a month instead of letting him rot in his house for another month before he leave to UniSel. Gah.

And what the fuck am I doing up so early? I slept at 2.45am and woke up at 8.19am.

-Spacem4nSpiff out.-

This sort of mental plague has been inflicted upon me on countless occasions. The ones that I can name at the top of my head are :

Games

• Star Wars Jedi Knight : Jedi Academy 
• Star Wars Jedi Knight II : Jedi Outcast
• Assassin’s Creed 
• Assassin’s Creed II
• Assassin’s Creed Brotherhood
• Pokemon Red, Blue, Yellow, Sapphire, Crystal, Emerald, Black, White

Films

• Avatar
• Chronicle
• Thor
• Spiderman
• Star Wars Episodes I - III
• District 9
• 9
• Iron Man 
• Heroes (TV series)

I would like to thank Wikpedia for all those links.

-Spacem4nSpiff out-

- ACT ONE- 

Church service as per usual. Something happened to the drummer during the service and since I am talking in the third-person point of view, it is obviously not me. The whole church was dark. Once the service was over, I stepped outside to a land covered in snow. Alor Star. Snow. Unbelievable. How can it possibly snow around the Equator? Unless the world plummeted into an ice age, of course. And also, evidently by my and the other church members’ presence, humanity survived.

Suddenly, out of the blue (or, rather… White.), comes Wim Hof, the alledged Ice Man who can endure in ice cold temperatures with nothing but boxers on; and Andrej Pejić, the world famous androgynous model who models for both women and men clothing. Both men were seen sledding along Lorong Tiong, the lane where my church and Superkids/Trinity Baptist Church are located at. Apparently, they were in some sort of competition. Andrej in his skin tight ski suit only drags behind him a small wooden sled but Wim, however, pulls behind him a large wooden crate, possibly containing his essentials for the competition. Wim was leading by about 10 meters. Andrej has trouble turning around corners with his pipe-like legs. They sped off into the sun… Something out of the ending of a novel.

-TERMINATE SEQUENCE-
-INITIATING ACT TWO-

It all starts with my brother’s friend’s mom talking on the phone to Pastor Leonard. The senior pastor in my church. I kinda spaced out on their conversation on the phone as I was busy watching a movie, complete with popcorn in one hand and milkshake in another. She was talking about some discount card thingy for a shop. And in a few minutes, I find myself with her in her car on the way to the mall to said shop. The roads don’t feel like one of those Malaysian roads. Thai or even American, probably.  The mall was pretty enigmatic. With dark coloured walls on the outside , accentuating the beautiful white marble statues coated with a soft yellow hue of the spotlight. And in the darkness of the night, the mall seem to look invisible if weren’t for the huge-jass sign board and the lights on the statues. Walked past some elevators and BAM, we’re at said shop. The shop has thick transparent glass walls, a spiral staircase, with a giant middle column for support and the counter is just directly beside the column. The shop sells ladies’ essentials like magazines , hair dyes and hair products, and etc. She pointed at the things she wanted (a magazine and two boxes of hair dyes, one with a soft emerald green colour and another one with a dark brown hue.) and got out her discount cards. Suddenly, Pastor Leonard pops out all of a sudden. I shot at him a friendly smile and looked away. He starts talking to my brother’s friend’s mom. And then, it starts to rain outside.

-END SEQUENCE TWO-

Why the hell am I in another country with my brother’s friend’s mother? And why does Pastor Leonard keep popping up every now and then? 

Edit : I forgot one very funny detail about one of my two dreams (I forgot which one.). I received a call from Gary, my sister’s schoolmate in Kolej who also has (maybe still) hit (hitting) on Sasha. He sounds very very creepy and possibly like one of those stereotyped gays. I forgot what it was that he was saying but I got really creeped out and immediately hung up. A booty call, maybe? * shudders *

So many questions which will go unanswered. This is, by far, the weirdest dream I have dreamt.

Until next time…

-Spacem4nSpiff out-

That is what I am, at the moment. Just surviving another day, with no goal or purpose.
No will to do anything. To the point of me considering to partake in these rituals which I find meaningless just to feel something.

When you’re this desperate to laugh, to cry, to even feel an impulse of emotion; you would be resorting to the conventional, more prominent methods of solving these methods (like alcohol and what-not) but self-destruction is not in any of my agendas.

I fake laughs, smiles, even faking disgust at certain things, actions or people just to “fit in” the conventional and accepted norm of reactions to these things.

Perhaps, I have to be more careful of what I wish for. I may long for a feeling of connection, but anxiety is a very potent corrosive agent which eats away your sleep, your appetite, your will to live; even. SPM results, Y U NO OUT EARLIER?

Fuck my life.

-Spacem4nSpiff out-

Then we went to have a drink at some place and went back to his place. I threw my luggage around and he took me shopping, saying that my clothes were , I quote ; “Unfashionable and unsuitable”.

That’s not the weird part yet. After coming back to his place yet again, I see Teacher Kamala, my form 2-3 English teacher; Adam, my classmate ; and Farhan, another classmate, all sitting there at John’s couch. All three of them shouted at me, asking for Christmas presents.  Confuzzled, I was.

And then, I was rudely awakened by my dog. Such a major buzzkill (Major Buzzkill, *salutes*)

-Spacem4nSpiff out-

The very definition of shitception would be Rebecca and Justine having a kid together. I know that Justine is female but apparently, she has both male and female organs which allow reproduction with Rebecca. Their demon-spawn would be the very definition of shitception.

Shit in another shit, producing shit^2.

Shitception may also be defined as Glee covering Justine or Rebecca’s songs. Ever heard of a shitty (and autotuned) group covering a shitty and autotuned song by a shitty and talentless singer?

- Rant mode : OFF -

-Spacem4nSpiff out-

First sequence : A female porn star in her birthday suit was shoving a dildo down a fully clothed guy’s mouth. The guy’s face had Indonesian-Chinese features. This “scene” was shown at some Porno Awards. Probably the Grabby. It was a humongous event. Nobody I recognize, though.

*MISSING DREAM SEQUENCE*

Second sequence : This one had more people I recognize in it. My father is this important/famous person like a politician or something. I was his bodyguard/spy along with  Sasha. We were walking out from a big event/gala when our position got compromised. A few bullets and missiles here and there and we got into our ride : A helicopter-aeroplane hybrid. It had two carbon-fiber propellers which go on the top of the aircraft. The propellers can change orientation, rotating 90° to a forward-facing position. My cousin, Jing Yan, Michelle, Soo Ling, my mom, uncle Jeffrey, aunt Wendy, Jun Lynn, Uncle Teoh and Aunt Jenny and Soo Pei all went into another of the same aircraft. Our pilot was someone very familiar but I am unable to recognize his identity. We just felt very comfortable with him.
Anyway, we were unable to take off due to the short run-way that was available. We crashed into the building directly in front of us (we were in a city, apparently. ) and evacuated the aircraft. We got back to the venue of the gala/dinner (which was a big-ass hotel, Ritz-Carlton, amazingly) and went into one of its rooms to think of the next procedure which ought to be taken to salvage the situation. Then, Jing Yan, Michelle and Sasha were bugging Soo Ling to play something with them but Soo Ling declined and they left the room.

*END DREAM SEQUENCE*

That was all I can remember (20 minutes after waking up. They say you’ll forget 95% of your dreams in the first 5 minutes of waking up, but I pwn you.)

Until the next voyage…. Bon voyage.

-Spacem4nSpiff out-

Rant mode : ON

At first glance, I thought that you were a decent human being, albeit a slightly plump one. But after you took a peek at me and said “Oh, look…. Chinese..” , I have already bludgeoned you to death more than seven times in my head. You are fat, those tight jeans and shirt are not suitable for you, fat ass. If you’re gonna be a Muslim, at least practice what you preach. Yuck Fou, bitch. Go be a racist somewhere else…

I WANT to kill you so badly, that I even composed a poem about you…

Fatties are red, the sky is blue; people like you belong in the zoo.
Don’t get angry, I’ll be there too.. Not in the cage, but laughing at you.
Then, I’ll be around, frantically searching.
Looking for methods for you which are fitting.
To end you might be a pretty shallow thing to do,
I should have just hired John Kramer for you.
You are both fat and unpleasant,
You should totally be my peasant.
If I know where you live ,
I will make it my motto so you never conceive.
Because people like you don’t belong on Earth,
Your face makes me wanna barf.

Yuck Fou, random bitch.

Rant mode : OFF.

-Spacem4nSpiff out-

In case you were born in the 00′s and don’t know who Calvin & Hobbes are, Calvin is a deceptively smart 6-year-old boy with a knack for annoying his parents and classmate/friend Susie, and an extremely large vocabulary for a six year old. Hobbes is Calvin’s imaginary friend anthropomorphic doll/toy tiger who is Calvin’s side kick and never fails to stun Calvin whenever he comes home from school.

SpacemanSpiff is one of Calvin’s many pseudonyms. As Spaceman Spiff, Calvin travels through space, destroying evil alien space ships and saving the good while stomping the evil.

The name came to light when my best friend Paul was playing Condition Zero and it kinda stuck.

Besides, it’s unique.

-Spacem4nSpiff out-.

Le chocolate.

I had this eureka moment for chocolate with chicken when I was watching this French cooking show on Astro channel 703. I forgot that lady’s recipe and I just goggled it for ease of mind and body.

Ingredients :
Tomato, small.
Onion, big.
Cooking chocolate, roughly 3/4 cups.
Cocoa powder, 1 tablespoon
Ketchup / Tomato sauce , 1/2 cup.
Paprika / Chili powder , 1 tablespoon (minimum. depends on your personal preference.)
Cinnamon , two teaspoons. (Optional)
Salt ‘n Pepper , to taste. Two pinches was all I used.

Observation / Feedback (from Dad)
Too sweet. (Probably due to the ketchup, should cut down on ketchup. )
A tad bit spicy. (Irrelevant because I love spicy food.)

For future reference : Cut down on ketchup. Chocolate aroma covered up by the ketchup.

I really hope that I am able to take better pictures with a better phone/camera but that is all I can manage at the moment. Au Revoir!

This sudden burst of hunger in your stomach was brought to you by : Caleb!

-Spacem4nSpiff out-